Take Your Hurt Feelings And Go!

Also if someone goes off on you after you’ve politely told them you’re not interested, consider yourself lucky because you dodged an enormous bullet. Sane humans beings, while hurt may offer words of regret or may even ask why but an unstable person will dredge up some crazy things to say to get a rise out of you, and the best response is no response. You can’t argue with someone who insecure and has a negative self-image because they will bring you down to the pits of their sadness and you deserve better than that. Take your rejections in stride, and take your hurt feelings and go.

Read More Take Your Hurt Feelings And Go!

Sitting With The Funk Of My Biases

Realistically though, the “straight” men that I’ve dated could be having bisexual encounters and I know nothing about it, and everything remains copacetic. However, a man choosing to openly disclose his sexual preferences, bracing for a rejection, and simply just wanting to be upfront and honest DESERVES an opportunity like everyone else to be accepted as they are. What exactly is the problem? How could I be enticed, and adore all aspects of this man, but reject his sexual preference? On what grounds am I rejecting him?

Read More Sitting With The Funk Of My Biases

The Spark

The routine of good morning texts, wyd texts, and let us make a plan to hang once a week is the antithesis of a slow burn, and I need slow burn. I believe in reaching out when I have something important to say, when I know I want to see him and we create that plan. I prefer to save conversations for in-person connection and taking it from there. Anyone who is a parent, works and has adulting to do is going to be very selective with their time and will want to spend it wisely. I can get behind that idea and take things as they come.

Read More The Spark

Namaste But NammafuckyouUp: Don’t Let The Easy Vibes Fool You

In fact, the advocacy IS to speak up when bothered and if it’s not understood when I say it tactfully, then I’ll just have to bring out my inner goon and let motherfuckers know that my personal peace trumps whatever the fuck they think of me. Yes, Namaste, the light in me sees the light in you, but Nammafuckyouup, the goon in me sees the shade in you. Do not fuck with me. Come to me respectfully, and I promise I will absolutely do the same. However I will not be muted, silenced or looked over because that’s what someone believes I deserve. I’m going to speak up for myself and that’s just that.


Read More Namaste But NammafuckyouUp: Don’t Let The Easy Vibes Fool You

…But He’s A Good Guy

Women should be able to wear whatever they’d like without some man assuming that’s an invitation for him to touch her. The responsibility should fall on men to educate other men on why respecting women matter and how touching women without permission is a gross violation of the trust that has already been established and why stepping in to shut down other men from violating women. It’s maddening to think about how many things women have to do in order to ensure we have a good night and make it home safely to reflect on the good time we had.

Read More …But He’s A Good Guy

Fight or Flight: An Exercise In Calming The Fuck Down

Hurt people hurt people, but hurt people can also heal. Our healing begins the moment we can acknowledge how hurt we have actually been and take inventory of how much life we have missed out on by barricading ourselves behind our walls. The walls keep out the people who are no good for us, yet it also very predictably keeps the wonderful ones at bay as well. We are making the choice to lose before we ever allow ourselves to get on the court. Life fucking hurts, people hurt us, but guess what? We hurt people too, and we are also the villains in someone’s story.

Read More Fight or Flight: An Exercise In Calming The Fuck Down