The Spark

The routine of good morning texts, wyd texts, and let us make a plan to hang once a week is the antithesis of a slow burn, and I need slow burn. I believe in reaching out when I have something important to say, when I know I want to see him and we create that plan. I prefer to save conversations for in-person connection and taking it from there. Anyone who is a parent, works and has adulting to do is going to be very selective with their time and will want to spend it wisely. I can get behind that idea and take things as they come.

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Namaste But NammafuckyouUp: Don’t Let The Easy Vibes Fool You

In fact, the advocacy IS to speak up when bothered and if it’s not understood when I say it tactfully, then I’ll just have to bring out my inner goon and let motherfuckers know that my personal peace trumps whatever the fuck they think of me. Yes, Namaste, the light in me sees the light in you, but Nammafuckyouup, the goon in me sees the shade in you. Do not fuck with me. Come to me respectfully, and I promise I will absolutely do the same. However I will not be muted, silenced or looked over because that’s what someone believes I deserve. I’m going to speak up for myself and that’s just that.


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The Fallout Of Good Intentions

What about when someone fucks up our well-oiled cast iron pan by washing it, scrubbing it and putting a copious amount of Ajax on it to get all the gunk out? Those of us who are kitchen aficionados know about this absolute faux pas, but my 80 something-year-old Trinidadian grandma who believes in everything needing to be spick and span doesn’t know, and her intention is to make it very clean. Am I really going to hold her well-intentioned cleaning against her? YES! I am kidding, I will be a little sad but I can get another cast iron pan.

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Sweet Liars

How does one process the painful ramifications of the fallout of the lies from a sweet liar? It’s almost easier to deal with an outright asshole because they never hid their deception. At least assholes are wolves from the beginning and you have a choice to lay with a hungry wolf, who you know will rip your heart and emotions to shreds. Also, with an asshole who is honest, you’ll never have to guess what’s coming, it’ll be in your face and you can make a conscious choice to tackle the situation or not.

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Heart Fluttering Business

I was joking with someone when I said I was in the heart fluttering business and they were like duh…no shit. I was like what the heck does that even mean? He looked at me really earnestly and almost teary eyed and said “The things you’ve told me about myself, are things no one has told me in more than two decades. You made me feel so good about myself.” That made me sad and happy at the same time. But mostly sad because there’s no way anyone should be sleeping in the same bed with someone and words of earnest kindness and warmth isn’t being shared everyday.

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Date Grown Ass Men

The conversation was organic, authentic and extremely easy. There wasn’t a whole lot of surface conversation about bullshit, we got right into talking about our projects, our kiddos, our life journeys and just all the important things that drive good conversation forward. He is very easy on the eyes, he has a slighter build than what I normally prefer BUT he’s so damn confident, and easy to talk to, so it didn’t actually matter at all. A couple drinks in me, and I felt more calm and more at ease to act out what I was thinking.

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