Someone’s Partner Is Not Your Soulmate

There is power in connecting with your partner when you tell the truth about what is happening in your head and heart. However, don’t fuck up your relationship based on your feelings for someone else. If you are looking to leave, do it based on the fact that it is no longer workable and it serves no one to stay. If someone leaves their relationship for YOU I am not convinced that’s a worthy burden to carry. If you think someone else’s partner is your soul mate, then you’re all fucked up in the game homey, because that is NOT the answer. Do better.

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Communication Saves Lives

I pride myself on being able to communicate effectively. Honestly though, sometimes I do fail and do not do as well as I can. I remember that when I am pissed at others and their communication or lack thereof. I give and make room for people to be themselves as they are and as they aren’t and I love them regardless. I have a deep and wide capacity for forgiveness, kindness and overstanding in tough situations. It is as much my responsibility not to assume malice, as it is theirs. It is also my responsibility to hold the space for clarity, compassion, empathy and respect. We are all fighting a battle, and we are all looking to be heard and sometimes when we are wounded, we are not our best selves and the way we communicate hurt may end up causing more hurt, we may not have the language, space or desire to speak out effectively. I get that.

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REMINDER

I have to resolve the fact that I need to make room to be loved in a way that makes it possible for people to do it their own way, AND while I can tell MY TRUTH, I have to give them room, space and time to get to their own because what I want from love is all the things I give myself AND I have to allow others to arrive there, but honor their ways of being, and their commitments the best way that they possibly could

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What If…

But like what if he said he was getting a divorce? Or what if he said his marriage as loveless? What if he said that he wanted to live a life where he was happier? What if he said he was there just to be a good dad? I dunno. What if, right? There would be a moment where I would not know what to do with that information. I literally would just be silent. I can do better when he tells me things are good. Because I am just thinking about us because it is a new thought. It makes my heart race.

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And Who Will Save Me?

I’m strong and I need support. I’m strong and I need to be hugged. I’m strong and I need forehead kisses. I’m strong and I need my hand held. I’m strong and I need gentle love making. I’m strong and I need soft kisses. I’m strong and I need to my head on your chest. I’m strong and I need your nurturing. I’m strong and I’m a human being with needs. My strength doesn’t absolve me of my mortal feelings.

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Nice For What?

We raise girls to be polite, to smile, to fall back and to be lady like for appeasement and acceptance from whom? We teach girls that their edges must be laid, and they should speak softly and learn how clean and cook well, often it is not with the intention of being self sufficient but rather to be marriage material for a man. Get the fucccccccccck outta here will all that noise. Raising children in my opinion should be teaching them about chasing their dreams, while putting in the work to make sure the dreams materialize. I believe we teach them practical skills so they can eat, live in a clean environment, make, and keep money and a combination of street smarts and common sense. The goal is to make them the best for themselves, proud of themselves, loving to themselves BUT never to be molded for someone’s vision of who we think they should be.

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Discipline

One of the sayings that has been landing in my path over and over again is “You’re not tired, you’re uninspired.” That is pretty much true isn’t it? Is it not powerful to think the majority of us commit our lives to working for non-profits, companies and everything in between and we often neglect out dreams, our vision and our own personal success?

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