You’re Nice But…

I automatically don’t trust any dude who is super into me straight out the gate. Nah. Nope. I’m not talking about a general interest, where there’s a flow of questions, we are chatting, we are hanging out, we text and we genuinely are learning each other. I’m talking about the dude who wants to make me his “baby” based on his perception of me, and not based on knowing me. Recently, I had an experience with someone who was doing too much too soon, and in my heart and my gut, I just knew that the situation didn’t feel right. I couldn’t go through with engaging him further because that was coming out of his mouth was absolute bullshit because he didn’t know ME, yet was proclaiming to give me all of these things. If I were my younger self, I’d be really into this guy, but the grown-up part of me would cringe every time this guy would speak. He was offering sweet nothings and saying words that held no weight at all, because he was talking to someone who he imagined, and wasn’t listening to ME.

The biggest red flag was when I asked him what he was passionate about. This is a question I ask most people because I want to see where their head is at and to see if they are a vibrational match for what I’m up to. If I’m gonna consider dating you, I have to know that you’re passionate about life, the things you’re into and I am not going to be your saving grace. Nah. I have have been that. I’m not interested. I have no interest in that role, so please, by all means, keep the fuck on and pass me by. Anyway, so I asked him what he was interested in, and he gave me like three paragraphs worth of shit he liked about me. Ummmmmm first of all sir, how the fuck you got all this shit to say but I’m pretty sure you don’t know my last name, you have no idea how many siblings I have, you don’t know my favorite color, and if you were asking me important questions, you’d know that what you are saying is making me itch and straight up repellent because you’re just saying shit you think I wanna hear. He did not say ANYTHING about his likes, his passions, his desires, his plans and when I called him on it, he said he didn’t know what he wanted him to say. I said, sir…TELL ME WHAT GETS YOU OUT OF BED EVERY DAY!!!!!!! Do you know what he said? Counting down the days until I meet you is what gets me out of bed. MOTHER FUCKER you are a murderer. What??!?? You have known me for .5 Seconds and you’re 46 years old AND I AM THE REASON YOU GET OUT OF BED??? Dude, you’re fucking wild and completely outrageous. Huge red flag. Date canceled.

The second red flag was when he was saying he was such a nice guy and he doesn’t understand why women always treat him like shit. First, the fuck of all, y’all knows that I have no patience, mercy, or sympathy for any man who says he’s far too nice and women take advantage of him. If I were an opportunist, gold-digging woman, I could have had this dude for all his shit. I would have played him because of his “niceness” and he would have just been a sucker. BUT I cannot hold myself back when I feel something strongly. So I asked him, why did he think women took him for granted. He said it’s because he gave too much of himself and they weren’t used to that. EYE FUCKING ROLL. Spare me, my dude. Spare me. It’s because you have no fucking boundaries. It’s because you want to give all of the shit you have to women who don’t know jack shit about, and if you’re offering, they were accepting and that’s on YOU!!! If you are giving away your goods to any and everyone because they are filling a void, then what the fuck do you think will happen? I could have had anything I wanted, but then his narrative would be fulfilled, but I REFUSE to help him be fucked up to himself. Not I said the fly.

I don’t like dealing with anyone who doesn’t have a trajectory for their life. Have zero interest in anyone who doesn’t have a passion in their life. I am not looking to merge my life with someone. I am interested in people who are interested in their activities and their passions. I want to be with someone who can talk about their life, and their day excitedly because they are building or have built something worth talking about. I refuse to be anyone’s sole reason to live because that’s a job I don’t want. I have no desire. You’re nice but are you up to anything? You’re nice but do you want to know ME? Or are you interested in giving me your recycled ass lines where you think one size fits all? I have always said I prefer honest assholes over sweet liars. It’s not sustainable, not reliable and therefore I am going to have to pass. I wish you well but I’m not the one for you. Good luck.

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