A Love Letter To My Younger Self

Dear Baby Goddess,

You can have every single thing that you think you deserve, but you have to work to get it. You are loveable, worth it, beautiful and desirable, but you have to work on remembering those things every day. Cultivate, maintain and work on your relationships with the girls and women in your life because they will ride for you harder and longer than any man ever could. Listen to what people have to say but watch their actions to see if it matches with their words. Give yourself the room to think, contemplate and weigh your options when it comes to life-altering decisions. Date a lot. Date all ages, all races, and men in every kind of financial situation. Trust your intuition because it is spot on almost every time. Workout, practice yoga and meditate every single day even if you do not want to, you will never regret it. Travel and have conversations with everyone because everyone is a teacher and a student. Walk away from energy that isn’t positive, productive or rooted in possibilities. Hurt people will hurt you, but do not make it about you. Do not compare yourself to anyone. Where you are is perfect and right where you need to be.

I know you have felt discouraged, and things are not working for you but that is what life is like. It is a rhythm of highs and lows and the lows may feel like they will last forever, but they will not. You have to learn to feel your way through the darkness and feel every single thing coming up inside of you. The pain, darkness, and breakdowns are necessary because it is teaching you resilience, perseverance, and courage. I need you to remember that even though you may feel like eating and sleeping your way through these dark times, don’t do that. Move your body, talk to your friends, reach out for advice, and write. Do not sit in silence and believe the voices in your mind telling you that you aren’t good enough. Fight back against your self-doubt, and feed yourself affirmations and healthy food. Self-care will take you further than a day of binge eating and binge watching. Take care of your body and your mind.

The way men and boys treat you is not a gauge on your worth. Men and boys are human just like you, and they have no power over you. There will never be a shortage of men who will desire you, want to fuck you and use you for their own gain. Date but create boundaries for yourself and for these men and boys. They can only do what you allow. If you don’t feel like doing something, do not do it. If something is happening that you do not like, speak up about it. If there is something that you need, make a request. Walk away when the situation stops feeling good and when you have outgrown it. Never, ever chase a man. If you like a man, make it known and either he will reciprocate or he will not, but your work is done after sharing your feelings. Runaway from a man who hurts your feelings or body on purpose. When men and boys want to leave, let them leave. You will not die from a broken heart. The time will pass, you will heal and you will be better for having that experience.

Women will forever and always be the most important group of advisors you will ever have. Listen to the advice that older women give you. Pay attention and take note of their stories, their experiences and anything they want to share. Their wisdom is invaluable and will save you a lot of heart and headaches. Forgive and apologize to your homegirls after falling outs. You are all learning yourselves, each other and are trying hard to navigate life. Things will get messy, and muddy but that’s okay because it is all a part of the process. Your connection with your sister friends will outlast every single crush, love of your life, boyfriend, lover, and a one-night stand. Your girls will laugh, cry and plot murder with you no matter how many times you fall in and out of love. Listen to them, thank them and appreciate them because they will remain resilient and steadfast even if you don’t talk for years. Your girls are here to stay.

You are beautiful. Your outer beauty is obvious but your inner beauty is what makes you special and unique. You have a glow, and a shine that can be seen by many, but will only be matched by a few. Never allow yourself to settle for your mind’s limits because you are far more capable than you’d ever imagine. Pursue your wildest, craziest and most fantastic dreams because you will learn more about yourself when you are in that space. Work on your writing every day because that is the access to unlocking your truth. The world needs your gift, and you have to share it. The words and the advice that you seek live within you. The love, light, and miracles that you think come from outside of you, do not. You are the goddess that you have been waiting for and seeking. The love that you desperately want will come from you when you learn to honor the boundaries you have created for yourself and others. Walk confidently because you have earned it. All of your breakdowns lead to breakthroughs. All of that darkness will lead you to discover your bright light. You will surpass every single goal for yourself and then some. Focus on loving yourself, focus on your goals and have the discipline to be better every single day. You are your biggest fan and your worst enemy. You are right where you need to be. Keep going.

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